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Reframing your L’s into W’s.
The phrase “it’s not rejection, it’s just redirection” has been floating around in my brain a lot lately, and as it bounces off the soft tissue on the inner walls of my brain, the sentiment echoes throughout my body.
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So many times in my life, I’ve wondered why things don’t work out, why I have such bad luck, what I’ve done to deserve every single horrible, terrible, no-good thing to happen to me. Why did my relationship end? Why couldn’t I find a job for almost a year? Why did those friendships dissolve?
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Taking on the perspective that all those roads closed in order to lead me somewhere better has been eye-opening for me for a few reasons.
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It’s a relieving, powerful statement to say that you didn’t get what you want because you deserve better.
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My relationship fell apart because I deserve a man who actually loves me, cherishes me, and sees value in me. I was unemployed for so long because the job I now have and love was waiting for me. Those friends walked out of my life because not everyone is meant to stay forever.
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It can be extremely frustrating to watch the things you want most slip out of your grasp like sand through a child’s fingers, to feel like you’re not good enough when relationships fall apart or interviews lead right back to browsing Indeed.
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But stepping back and widening your perspective is essential. Instead of driving yourself crazy with what-ifs, accept what is and what will be. Whenever something doesn’t work out in your favor, take it as an opportunity not only for self-reflection, but also as an opportunity to take a breath and let go.
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When it doesn’t work out, you free up more space in your mind for something else that may be a better fit for you.
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Not everything works out because not everything is meant to work out.
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But the exciting thing about life is that it is forgiving; there are infinite ways that our circumstances can change through both our own efforts and what some might describe as luck.
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The best thing we can do for ourselves, and truly what we ultimately owe to ourselves, is to get control over our own lives. To take back the power and not let disappointments drag us down, but allow us to shed a layer and move us closer to achieving our goals and living our dreams.